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Apr. 12th, 2008 04:54 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
caithreamI got my letter from UCF today.
I didn't get in.
Because of fucking "state budget cuts" and reducing enrollments, that's why.
Here's the thing. I've been fantasizing about moving and doing this every single damn day since I got the invitation to live over there. I feel like I'm stuck in a fucking rut, my once really good friends are now off doing God knows what with each other, I'm LONELY as fuck, and I don't even feel like I'm LIVING. I want this so damn bad, and that was like fucking slap in the face, opening up that letter.
I'm not giving up, not yet. Firstly, they haven't even SEEN my huge transcript from USF, as I put a hold on it until after the grades for this semester are finally submitted. I'll be a TRANSFERRING SENIOR, not a fucking freshman just jumping in to the Florida accredited college system. I'm going to call the offices on Monday and grill them, 'cause why the fuck would you accept or decline a transferring student without even looking at the GRADES? Or maybe that's just my own dumb fault for sending it too early. I don't know. And if that doesn't work... I don't know. I just don't fucking know.
I mentally and physically cannot do this 60+ mile drive every single day back and forth from USF anymore. Can. Not. Do it. I'll blow my brains out before I go through my whole senior year doing it again. I want to move whether or not I get accepted into UCF, I guess I'd just... I don't even know. Not do my fall semester and then apply again for the spring sememster, finish up classes during the summer semester? And that royally fucks up everything, I mean, I guess it's not THAT big of a deal to graduate out of the time frame of everyone else, and I was planning on taking a year off of school after I graduate, so. I don't know. You just, you have everything planned out in your head and then suddenly that disappears. I know, I know, life is unexpected, blah blah, but God, my heart is aching to do this. I just don't know.
Now I've got to calm myself down and stop crying before I head off to work, augh.
I didn't get in.
Because of fucking "state budget cuts" and reducing enrollments, that's why.
Here's the thing. I've been fantasizing about moving and doing this every single damn day since I got the invitation to live over there. I feel like I'm stuck in a fucking rut, my once really good friends are now off doing God knows what with each other, I'm LONELY as fuck, and I don't even feel like I'm LIVING. I want this so damn bad, and that was like fucking slap in the face, opening up that letter.
I'm not giving up, not yet. Firstly, they haven't even SEEN my huge transcript from USF, as I put a hold on it until after the grades for this semester are finally submitted. I'll be a TRANSFERRING SENIOR, not a fucking freshman just jumping in to the Florida accredited college system. I'm going to call the offices on Monday and grill them, 'cause why the fuck would you accept or decline a transferring student without even looking at the GRADES? Or maybe that's just my own dumb fault for sending it too early. I don't know. And if that doesn't work... I don't know. I just don't fucking know.
I mentally and physically cannot do this 60+ mile drive every single day back and forth from USF anymore. Can. Not. Do it. I'll blow my brains out before I go through my whole senior year doing it again. I want to move whether or not I get accepted into UCF, I guess I'd just... I don't even know. Not do my fall semester and then apply again for the spring sememster, finish up classes during the summer semester? And that royally fucks up everything, I mean, I guess it's not THAT big of a deal to graduate out of the time frame of everyone else, and I was planning on taking a year off of school after I graduate, so. I don't know. You just, you have everything planned out in your head and then suddenly that disappears. I know, I know, life is unexpected, blah blah, but God, my heart is aching to do this. I just don't know.
Now I've got to calm myself down and stop crying before I head off to work, augh.
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no subject
Date: 2008-04-13 07:43 am (UTC)If I don't get to have you as a roommate I will cry for a whole year. :(((
Try not to feel so bad. Even if you do have to skip a semester, just think of it as a nice long break from all the essays. ALSO ILU VERY MUCH AND YOU ARE AMAZING AND UCF DOESN'T DESERVE YOU. ♥♥♥
no subject
Date: 2008-04-13 10:51 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-04-14 05:14 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-04-14 07:42 pm (UTC)