(no subject)

[caithream]

Drove home yesterday, first time being back since I moved out.

Cried. Like, a lot.

My first mistake was walking into my empty, echoing room the second I got home, and seeing a rocking chair just sitting there. I don't know. It kind of just... did me in. So I haven't gone back in there. I can't. I'm sleeping in my sister's room since she's in North Carolina right now.

I don't know why exactly I'm so stupidly sentimental, like I'm more emotional than near everyone else on the planet, but it sucks. A lot. I shouldn't be looking around my house late at night thinking this isn't mine anymore, I don't belong to this anymore when I can and do, I can have two at once, I can still belong. It's just... it's a really weird thing when you bring a suitcase full of stuff to live out of back to your own house.

Not to mention the fact that my 6:45 to 12:45 shift yesterday leaned a little more towards the shitty end of the spectrum. The really really dumb thing about this Starbucks (which no one will truly understand unless they work at one themselves) is that the registers are all the way at the front and the bar and the cups for marking are more towards the middle/end of the store. This means that instead of the people on register marking the cups and prepping them with syrups, the person who's on bar has to stop everything they're doing and mark the cups when the person on register calls them out (which happens mostly over the sound of the frappuchino machine going to town or the milk screaming from the steam wand so of course I have to ask to repeat it over and over because I can't hear a goddamn thing) and then can get back to the drinks on hand, except when the cycle starts over two seconds later. It's SO inconvenient and illogical and they threw me on bar for nearly five hours straight yesterday (oh my back, my fucking back) and for a good hour and a half I constantly had about seven drinks in the lineup because I had to stop and mark and prep and then finish what I was doing. It honestly feels like one hand is tied around my back when I'm so used to getting them OUT and done so quick.

It's a stupid complaint, I know, but I still feel like I'm five and want to throw a tantrum because this isn't MY store, it isn't how I'M used to and I don't LIKE IT. I know that I need to roll with the punches and just get used to this, if I can. I have a few other problems with this store - the fact that they sometimes sacrifice the quality of the drink for efficiency and speediness which makes me DIE A LITTLE inside - but hopefully I can change that if I stick around long enough. I don't know.

Today I went over to my old store and God, I miss it so much. Got hugs from the girls there. One thing that I'm REALLY REALLY happy about is the fact that this one old coworker of mine is pretty darn sure that she's going to be moving relatively soon to the same area that I'm now in, and a lot of partners at the store where I'm working now are leaving, so HOPEFULLY HOPFULLY she can transfer over to that store too. Oh God. That would be so great. We could, you know, CHANGE THINGS. And give each other Looks when someone on bar dumps in more foam than milk into a latte. Little things like that would just help me out so much.

In no way do I regret this move or anything like that but, per usual, these kind of things build up and build up until something hits the pressure release, etc etc. Daytime is easier than the night, but tonight I'm going out drinking with all my old coworkers, so that should be fun. Plus I'll be back next weekend for 4th of July festivities, and I'm really really looking forward to that. So yeah. Bottom line is I'm still pitifully and lamely sentimental, but I'm sure things'll get better as the weeks go by.

In other news, SO AWESOME! Sometimes I forget how truly EPIC AND AMAZING the Winchesters are, 'cause this just makes me tingly. And OOH, even though we aren't getting any commentaries on the episodes, we ARE getting "Closer Looks" on a few episodes with Kripke and Sera Gamble and Ben Edlund and all that, so yay! That's better than nothing!

Comments

[spazzbot.livejournal.com]

*hugs*

Growing up sucks, doesn't it? I remember the first time I went to my Dad's house after they turned my room into a guest bedroom, and gah, it shouldn't hurt but it does. But, it'll get better, I promise. :) And there's nothing wrong with being emotional or sentimental. It might hurt worse when things are sad, but it's so worth it to feel like things really mean something.

Also, I may not work at Starbucks, but uh, I've been to enough to realize that that is a really inefficient setup! There are some in my area set up that way, and they seem even MORE chaotic than the normal coffeeshop chaos I expect, with everyone shouting orders back and forth. And GRR, I hate sacrificing quality for speed! That's something that comes up a lot in my job, and it tends to piss me off. So what if you can do 12 sheet cakes in 20 minutes! If they all look like SHIT, it's not worth the time saved, IMO.

[caithream.livejournal.com]

Oh man. :( My parents said that they're planning to make it a guest bedroom of sorts, which I have no problem with, it'll just be a lot weird, like you said. And yeah, that's what my dad said, about being emotional. He said he would rather me be this way then totally apathetic, which is true. Just hurts a lot. :(

For real! It's so MORONIC! And this is a NEWER store. What the hell. AAAGGH YES EFFICIENCY FOR SPEED JUST MAKES ME WANT TO TEAR MY HAIR OUT. Don't have enough milk to fill the cup and don't want to steam more? JUST FILL IT THE REST OF THE WAY WITH WHIPPED CREAM. UUUGGGHH.