caithream | Customers drive me to drinking.

And, I mean, it's not even THAT BAD, I've heard horror stories, some of my friends have LIVED through them, but holy God, I'm pretty sure I used to be a lot nicer (or at least a lot more innocent) when it came to dealing with customers.

WHAT IS IT with working on Sundays! It's like, all the crazies come out on Sundays to play at Starbucks! WHY?! Firstly, we had this older couple come in and buy two pounds of coffee, blah blah, whatever. They hang around, then go outside for a bit, then come back in a bit later. I'm making a frappuccino when all of a sudden I hear, "HAVE YOU SEEN MY GLASSES??" and I nearly had a heart attack because the lady is standing behind our counter. REALLY?? In WHAT WORLD do you come behind the counter WHERE YOU DO NOT BELONG to get someone's attention?! Anyway, the lady was shitting bricks because she lost her $300 Gucci sunglasses and was demanding to know where they were, because the she accidently left them on the counter by the register, so how do you not know where they are?! And we were like, uhh, haven't seen them? Sorry. So, she leaves.

TWENTY MINUTES LATER her husband comes in with her demanding where sunglasses, and we were like, dude, we don't know. They then proceed to tell us that it was really fishy that a Starbucks employee left around the same time they did in a Volvo. And we were like, UH, no one has left since the time you came and went? And who the fuck in here can afford to drive a VOLVO?? So, whatever, placations met when we said we'd send a note to Seattle to review the security tapes. I MEAN, it's just, I really hate it when false accusations are made against other people, my own PARTNERS, to suggest that we'd steal Gucci sunglasses. AUUGH.

INCIDENT NUMBER TWO involved this same idiotic kid who called a week or two ago on the SAME DAY at the SAME TIME with the SAME EXCUSE: "Uh, yeah, I found a hair in my frappuchino. Really really blonde (though it was 'really really dark' the time before). It was a venti chocolately something. I don't know what." To which I snarled into the phone, "Uh, okay, really? Fine. Come back in and we'll get you another one." I then ranted and raved to my coworkers because I KNEW this kid, had pulled the SAME SHIT before. So ten minutes later he comes in with his little asshole buddy and so I start:

Kid 1: Yeah, I just called.
Me: Oh, yeah, really. That's funny, 'cause I remember getting the exact same call with the exact same excuse a week or two ago about uh, let's see. Was it a venti java chip frappuchino?
Coworker O: Yeah, don't you think it's a LITTLE bit coincidental that the same thing would happen two times in a row?
Kid 1: Uhh, well. I dunno... I don't really know any of the drinks here...
Kid 2: Yeah, I just get iced coffee. *Makes retarded smug face*
Me: Huh. When did you come in to get it?
Kid 1: Oh, my dad actually got it for me...
Me: Interesting, 'cause you said the same thing last week. What was it.
Kid 1: Uhh... I dunno. It was some chocolately... cold... thing.
Me: We have a lot of chocolately cold things. Last time it was a java chip. What do you want this time.
Kid 1: Look, if you don't believe me...
Coworker O: Oh, no, no, we believe you. Just tell us what it was.
Kid 1: Uh, I think it was a double chocolate thingy. Actually, I think it was a tall. Yeah.
Me: What-the-fuck-ever.

I made it for reasons I don't even understand. We should have booted that little shit out of the store without a second thought. Whatever. I'm putting all my coworkers on notice so that little fucker doesn't come back in thinking he's all awesome and smart for pulling a fast one on us. God. I just HATE IT when people do that, like they think we don't know. Like when people get a triple espresso over ice in a venti cup and then go to the condiment counter and fill it up the rest of the way with the half-and-half/whole milk/nonfat that's over there? ARE YOU KIDDING ME. Do you NOT THINK we don't know what you're doing? Cheapskate assholes, just pay for the whole thing if you're gonna make the effort.

DO YOU SEE. It's these LITTLE THINGS that just culminate and get me so angry that BLOOD is gonna start shooting out of my eye. Well, no, it's big things too, like the utter asshole who came in a couple days ago and was ridiculously patronizing and rude to my fellow employee (who was having a bad day to begin with); she snapped, just a bit, and the end result was him saying, "You can just shove that cup up your ass!" There really needs to be some line drawn between "The customer is always right" and someone being just so downright rude and insulting, because I don't care if the company wants me to be their robot, there are FEELINGS involved in the employee as well, not just with the customer. You can't treat someone like shit without getting some retaliation back. Right? I don't care WHO the company is, I am NOT going to be your little apathetic robot while customers walk all over me. Of course, you still might lose your job anyway.

SIGH, I'M SORRY. This rant has been needing to come out for a while.

OH WAIT, one more thing. I hate boys my age who are utter douchebags (DOUCEBOXES.) This guy and his ~~slutty~~ girlfriend and her friend came in the other day, and he was paying for the drinks with a $50. We can't accept $50s, 'cause we have a dropbox under the register. I say, "Oh, do you have anything smaller?" He goes, "Nope, but I got something bigger." HAR FUCKING HAR. And I'm like, wow, you should really congratulate yourself on being such a douchebag! In front of your girlfriend, no less! GOOD JOB.

I love my job. I really really do. I just hate, loathe, CANNOT STAND working with the general public. Most of the time. My faith in humanity = FAIL.

But oh, okay, this? Oh my God, you guys. It has made me do the serious, hand flaily, mouth covering, high-pitched noise wibble. JIM. JIIIIIM. OH BOYS. That makes me really happy to see, n'aw.

And I would say that YOU ALL need to shut up about Iron Man, but I'm finally SEEING IT tomorrow, YAY. Also, I'm kind of ridiculously looking forward to Speedracer. OH NO.