caithream | (no subject)

The Starbucks in a mall in Oviedo called and left a message on my cellphone, saying that they have an opening July 1st and wondering if I was still interested. But this Starbucks is a) in a MALL and b) a good half an hour drive on a busy day. I'm pretty sure my manager only JUST emailed the other store, the one with the amazingly nice manager, but I'm gonna go ahead and call her tomorrow to see what's up. Hopefully she'll be able to tell me whether or not she was really truly serious about accepting my transfer, and if so, when that would be. Hopefully that'll give me a good enough answer to give the Oviedo store, sigh.

Finally started packing today. I dunno... I've been playing a mantra of I'm leaving I'm leaving I'm leaving, trying to shock myself into realization for so long now all I want to do is get it done. I've been having minor breakdowns at night while my family is asleep because even though they don't say it, I know I'm devastating them with this move and so I can't just tell them how scared I am and how homesick I'll be. But if I completely give in to sentimentality I'll be so screwed so... yeah. Just trying to gloss over the emotional aspects of everything and get it done.

Except... my last day of work is next Friday, and fuck, I'm really going to miss everyone.

I picked up a 7:30 to 2:15 shift for someone tomorrow, so early bedtime. I'm PMSing and moody and eating everything in sight so yeah, unconsciousness sounds really good right about now.

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I've been having minor breakdowns at night while my family is asleep because even though they don't say it, I know I'm devastating them with this move and so I can't just tell them how scared I am and how homesick I'll be.

Don't worry, I do this EVERY time I'm home. I remember doing it when I was in school just a couple hours away and could come home every weekend, if I wanted. You're not alone.

That's... that's good to know, actually, so I don't feel so much like a wussy or anything, haha. This is my first time moving ANYWHERE so I know it's kinda logical to feel this way, but I just really, really wish I didn't. <3

The way I see it, it's never a bad thing to go ahead and call the store you'd prefer to work at. Then they know you're interested and that you follow through on things.

Also, moving is rough. But it does get easier.

Yeah, I'm definitely going to keep in touch with both stores, just in case something falls through. I guess I should be just glad at this point that I might have options, heh.

I've never moved before, so this is gonna be quite an experience, I'm sure. :\

*hugs* Oh, honey. Change is always hard, but also always inevitable. You can't live at home with your family forever - and I'm sure they don't expect it. You're moving on to a new phase of your life, and it will be exciting and fun and everything it's supposed to be, but you will still grieve for what you're leaving behind. Honor that... there's nothing wrong with it.

Talking to them about how you're feeling might actually help, you never know. I'm sure they will miss not having you at home all the time, but what they really want is for you to be happy.

Just remember: like all things, this too shall pass.

Uggh, yeah, that's EXACTLY what I keep telling myself - that and I'll be utterly MISERABLE if I stay here any longer, because I have NO LIFE. It's time to GET ON WITH IT instead of playing it safe and being afraid of change. See, I waffle. I go from terrified to YES LET'S DO THIS NOW PLEASE. It's ridiculous.

I should, but. I don't exactly know what their reaction would be, and that's what's scaring me, I guess. What's funny is I'm trying to avoid all the tears on the last day, but I just know that's gonna happen, sigh.

♥♥♥

<3333333333333333333333333333 u. *clings* Most of us are only a phone call away. And also are good listeners. ♥

Edited 2008-05-28 05:23 (UTC)

VERY good listeners who provide the most wonderful distractions. <33333333!!

*tacklehug*
I ♥ you. JUST WANTED YOU TO KNOW! And good luck with packing, it's strenuous, but worth it in the end. :)

:D Thank you, darling. I tend to panic more than a situation calls for, so this is pretty par for the course, heh. <333

I think we're a lot the same in that when we've got ~*EMOTIONS*~ going on, we usually like to keep it to ourselves.

However, that being said, I'm with Chrissy; I'm always only a phone call away, even if it's just to distract yourself with letting someone talk to you about how hot Jensen's EVERYTHING is. ♥♥♥

Ugh, yes. It usually ends up backfiring in a really bad way, but I guess I just can't learn my lesson. :\

♥♥♥♥ you both. Lots and lots and LOTS.

*hugs*

You'll do great ♥

Oh goodness, I certainly hope so. <3

aww, I'm sorry. that sounds like it sucks. I know what that's like, when my family left and I was all by myself when I moved out for the winter at 16, I was crying for like an hour, and I wouldn't admit it to them. I love them to pieces, but I had to remember that I had to do what I came to do, and I mean, I loved what I was doing so I just chinned up and thought about what I loved.
I think it's worth it to remember your family is also always still there, you can always go back to them and talk to them and be with them and count on them. That's nice.

Yeah, that's exactly it, I guess. It needs to be done, but it hurts so bad doing it. But thank you so much, babe, these are definitely the kind of reminders I need. <3